Some things in life serve only to induce rage. No matter how small these annoyances may be, they are never insignificant. 'Rant List' is the chronicle of one self-loathing narcissist's seemingly unending pettiness.

Saturday, 17 April 2010

3. Woman's life-style magazines

^ A disheartening amount of effort went in to making this picture. Equally, I could have used a photo of Kerry Katona but I didn't want to risk the Google Image Search.

For some reason we have an issue of Cosmopolitan in our toilet (probably the best place for it, thinking about it) and the amount of vapid articles it contains is utterly shocking. Firstly, their particular feature about what men talk about on their "lads only" excursions to the pub was just one of the most misguided stereotyping sessions I’ve ever read. I understand that not everyone goes to the pub to discuss the intricate details of Led Zeppelin's discography (although they really should) but their proliferation of the myth of all men as drunken Neanderthals who only discuss tits when grouped together was plain unreasonable. But that’s not where my main complaint lies - I'm remarkably indifferent about my gender being stereotyped.

What bothers me far more are the pathetically obvious attempts to warp the perceptions of women who are in an unfortunate enough situation to look to this text-based trash for guidance. Features such as “WAYS TO MAKE A MAN FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU!!” and “TIPS FOR BLOW-HIS-MIND SEX” scream of the overly present attitude of “Quick! Attach yourself to some man before you die alone, miserable and a cat-lady!” that has come to embody the female-orientated media. I might be completely off the track, but aren't women's magazines meant to be an exercise in empowerment? What exactly is empowering about further perpetuating the idea that a woman needs a man in order to be considered a "real" or successful person? I'm all for finding contentment in relationships, but these magazines pervade desperation and misinformation rather than even attempt to provide genuine advice. I realise I'm starting to sound like a feminist, but the ridiculous stance these magazines take is rather disgusting.

BONUS: Fifty pence to whoever spots the typo in the above cover. Answers on a post card to;

Sam K
This Isn't A Real Address
London
PO Box You're A Tool If You Read This Far

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